(March 2, 2017) The lesson in Deborah Newell’s book, “Memories in a Daughter’s Heart,” is that dealing with grief can take many forms. For Newell it came as writing a book about dealing with the loss of her mother.
Newell, a Snow Hill native now residing in Virginia Beach, lost her mother, Rachel Chapman, about 10 years ago. Chapman was a local Kindergarten teacher until she retired in 1984 or 1985.
Writing the book took about five years.
“When we discovered mom was having memory problems, I realized I needed to keep track of this stuff,” she said. “Mom was very independent and didn’t want anyone to know about her troubles.”
Newell’s father died when she was about 8 years old, she said. From there, Chapman, born in 1912 and raised during the Depression, got a job teaching Kindergarten and kept it for 25 years while raising Newell. Her independent spirit led to the concealment of her symptoms, which she tried to hide from both her sister and daughter, until they couldn’t be hidden any longer.
Not knowing what to do with the emotions she was feeling and saddled with the responsibility of her mother’s affairs, Newell turned on the computer each night and just started writing.
“I never kept a journal before. I began writing down the stories I knew. It’s amazing what comes back to you,” she said.
What emerged was a mixture of memoir and a self-help guidebook for children who have recently lost a parent.
Grief is strange, she said, because “others have felt the same — everyone’s grief is different, but it’s also kind of the same.”
A big part of the book is how to deal with it all — things like planning a funeral or cleaning out the basement.
“There are the things we all go through, like the first Thanksgiving without her, and I had a girlfriend ask me how I got through it all,” she said. “I’m trying to help other daughters and sons.”
The book’s focus is on daughters and mothers, but Newell said men would be able to get something out of it as well.
“For me, at the time of my mother’s passing, I only had one girlfriend who had lost her mother and I had to depend on her,” Newell said. “I’m trying to be that for others. It’s important to know there’s life after grief, and we all have to go through it.”
The book was published at the end of last year, but this is the first event to promote it, Newell said.
“I was hoping to do my first book signing in Snow Hill because she is known here,” Newell said.
Ann Coates, owner of Bishop’s Stock, was pleased to provide the venue.
“There is a generation who will fondly remember Newell’s mother, Rachel Chapman, as a beloved teacher. It is to this same generation that Newell addresses her book since adult children now find themselves making emotional, mental, and practical preparation for those last years parents and children have together,” Coates said in a release. “With her writing, the author hopes this practical and timely book will aid in being prepared for those years.”
Newell is scheduled to appear for the book signing from 1-4 p.m. at Bishop’s Stock at 202 W. Green Street. “Memories in Daughter’s Heart” is also available in paperback online through Amazon and Easter Press. For more information contact Bishop’s Stock at 410-632-3555 or info@bishopsstock.com.
Newell, a Snow Hill native now residing in Virginia Beach, lost her mother, Rachel Chapman, about 10 years ago. Chapman was a local Kindergarten teacher until she retired in 1984 or 1985.
Writing the book took about five years.
“When we discovered mom was having memory problems, I realized I needed to keep track of this stuff,” she said. “Mom was very independent and didn’t want anyone to know about her troubles.”
Newell’s father died when she was about 8 years old, she said. From there, Chapman, born in 1912 and raised during the Depression, got a job teaching Kindergarten and kept it for 25 years while raising Newell. Her independent spirit led to the concealment of her symptoms, which she tried to hide from both her sister and daughter, until they couldn’t be hidden any longer.
Not knowing what to do with the emotions she was feeling and saddled with the responsibility of her mother’s affairs, Newell turned on the computer each night and just started writing.
“I never kept a journal before. I began writing down the stories I knew. It’s amazing what comes back to you,” she said.
What emerged was a mixture of memoir and a self-help guidebook for children who have recently lost a parent.
Grief is strange, she said, because “others have felt the same — everyone’s grief is different, but it’s also kind of the same.”
A big part of the book is how to deal with it all — things like planning a funeral or cleaning out the basement.
“There are the things we all go through, like the first Thanksgiving without her, and I had a girlfriend ask me how I got through it all,” she said. “I’m trying to help other daughters and sons.”
The book’s focus is on daughters and mothers, but Newell said men would be able to get something out of it as well.
“For me, at the time of my mother’s passing, I only had one girlfriend who had lost her mother and I had to depend on her,” Newell said. “I’m trying to be that for others. It’s important to know there’s life after grief, and we all have to go through it.”
The book was published at the end of last year, but this is the first event to promote it, Newell said.
“I was hoping to do my first book signing in Snow Hill because she is known here,” Newell said.
Ann Coates, owner of Bishop’s Stock, was pleased to provide the venue.
“There is a generation who will fondly remember Newell’s mother, Rachel Chapman, as a beloved teacher. It is to this same generation that Newell addresses her book since adult children now find themselves making emotional, mental, and practical preparation for those last years parents and children have together,” Coates said in a release. “With her writing, the author hopes this practical and timely book will aid in being prepared for those years.”
Newell is scheduled to appear for the book signing from 1-4 p.m. at Bishop’s Stock at 202 W. Green Street. “Memories in Daughter’s Heart” is also available in paperback online through Amazon and Easter Press. For more information contact Bishop’s Stock at 410-632-3555 or info@bishopsstock.com.